Article | Hiding Behind Fear

Over the last few days I've seen the local rumour mill spin a huge drama from a single grain of truth and it made me realise how much some people love to live in fear.

In fact, it seems that some people thrive on fear and get a real buzz from spreading that fear as far and as wide as it will go!

And we all do it to some extent.

The phone rings late at night and we immediately assume that it's bad news, when it's usually a wrong number. We see a police checkpoint up ahead and automatically feel guilty of some obscure crime. A loved one is late for dinner and we imagine them dead in a ditch somewhere.

So what is it about fear that's so addictive and compulsive? Why do we all seem to naturally gravitate towards the negative?

My theory is that it feels safer there.

If we expect the worst, we won't be sideswiped by life when bad things inevitably happen to us and so we protect ourselves from pain by pre-empting it. We hide behind a wall of ‘worst-case-scenarios' just so that we can say ‘I knew that would happen' or ‘I told you so' and never have to be disappointed.

Fear is our defence mechanism against being hurt by life, but in the end it's the fear that does the most damage because it prevents us from fully experiencing this wonderful adventure.

It's a bit like wanting to ride a roller-coaster, but only as long as the scary parts are left out.

Life can be tough. Sometimes it hurts and sometimes it's downright terrifying. But it's also amazing and exhilarating and joyful and we can't really appreciate all the shades of light and dark if we're only focussed on keeping out the dark.

It takes courage to lift up your heart and expect the best from life because it leaves you exposed and vulnerable, but it's also the only way to fully embrace the miracle that we were born to participate in.

Contributed by Eileen Bennett, Ireland
www.EileenBennett.com
www.askmammy.ie